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The secret is that when you help others, you help yourself! Welcome to our world readers and friends from the US, Slovenia, Hungary, and New Zealand 😉

Thank you Alejandra for your letter. It is hard to give a comment on what you said, but I think you’re handling the situation quite well so far.

Alejandra sent us the following:

“Dear Sophie,
I’m one of your dedicated readers. I have to read every word you write. It’s such a great amusement and learning to read it. My question is related to they called my ethnicity or my origin, or whatever you want to call it. I belong to  a country  adjacent to Mexico. Many times I’m being mistaken for being a Mexican because I speak Spanish, but it’s a version of Spanish actually. 

I feel awkward whenever that happened. I do not want anyone to assume that I am Mexico, not that Mexican are bad people. But there is always a stereotype associated with the group of people you belong to. If I am not right in anything I say, pls correct me.

Due to the continuous errors from others, I decided to change my name, so that I would make sure that no-one ever assume in any way that I belong to Mexico. I chose a big American name, not sure what its origin was, but I know that for sure it was not Mexican.  Oh! I divorce my husband, who looked like a typical Mexican, but I divorced him for another reason, not because of that.

I wanted to marry someone white with green eyes and tall body. I couldn’t find any except someone from a mix family where the father was a Filipino and the mother was white. His eyes were not green though. His last name was English. 

The guy was uncomfortable introducing me to his friends, but that was not the problem. The issue was that people still associate me with Mexicans, which I am not. I feel embarrassed every time that occurred to me. I keep telling them that I was not Mexican. I stopped speaking Spanish, I only speak English for many years, but when I go to a store, the cashier would speak in Spanish to me. Awwful 😦

Sophie, please tell me what I should do. If it was my origin, I would not be ashamed of it, but it is not. I can’t feel proud of being Mexican, because I am not one. That made me hate my origin even more. I started claiming that I’m completely American, and that I know of no other language. My Spanish is not that good any more, and I’m torn out between refreshing it back, and not to lose it, or just lose it since I don’t have kids or relatives that I care to speak with anyway. I need your advice. Thank you.”

My co-worker and I spoke together about that letter, and we all felt sorry for you, Alejandra, not that you did something wrong. You were mainly trying to survive wherever you were, and you wanted to feel belonging to your community. Our guess is that if your community was more accepting and inviting to you, no matter what ethnicity you were from, you could have enjoyed your life better.

Our only advice which we all agreed upon is that you can do what will make you happy, so long as you do not harm anyone else. Live in peace and respect others, this is the key to live happy in diversity or inclusion.

Thank you Alejandra for allowing us to share your letter, and, readers, please send your comments or write them online. 

Keep reading the posts you’ve missed, you never know what would inspire you. Until we talk again, here’s our hugs and kisses ❤