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Your Brain Can Play tricks on you! In love with your boss? Have you ever heard of Stockholm syndrome? People in positions of power are often attractive even if they are absolutely horrible.
Here’s the letter we received:
Life has its odd situations, and I don’t know why I have this.
Every time I work at any place, I just fall in love with my boss. Most of the time, my bosses were females and older than I, but I still feel very attracted to them.
The last job it was at one of the banks, and every time my boss showed her face or pass by my stand, I wanted to impress her by doing anything to attract her attention.
At some level, I fel there is a kind of “like” or admiration, or may be I am narcissist. I’m not sure what it is that I’m feeling or suffering from, Sophie!
I need your help or the help of any friend in our group. It is something that is bothering me, and sometimes I’m not able to sleep well, or dream of my boss all the time, or imagine myself talking to her. Well, most probably it is all in my mind, and this is my major problem. It could be nothing except imagination or illusion, but why it happens to me, no matter where I go or change my place of work, it keeps happening over and over again as if I have no control what soever over feeling that. That kind of attraction, as if there is some kind of magnetic that is felt in the air, it gives me a huge energy, and when I feel it, I don’t want it to end, it is just so cool to feel like that.
I talked to many people in our team/group to figure out some help for you: G.M. We came to the conclusion of the following:
- Define the problem.
- Its elements.
- Decide best solutions.
At first you need to know if your boss has a crush on you or not. Probably it is your imagination, or may be it is partially/completely true. Here are few flags that would help you ploy to the best:
. What your guts say:
Most people will give their managers the benefit of the doubt at first, but sometimes there’s an inner voice telling you that something between you two feels awkward, says Lynn Taylor, a national-workplace expert and leadership coach and the author of “Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant.”
Observe how the boss treats other colleagues before leaping to any conclusions, May be she is normally like to act playfully with people. Interpreting someone else’s intentions behind their actions is hard, you’ve got to be cautious.
. Private or late-night meetings
It is certain, if it is only with you, a crush.
. Call or Text
For no particular reason, she texts or calls you and take the time to do this, it is not normal.
. Body language
Eye contacts and body language are revealing. Watch the way she moves around you. Pay attention to her glances, or hands and lips reaction.
. Preferential Treatment
Yes, it could be simply because they respect you and trust your abilities, but if it crosses over into clear favoritism — for example, they offer you opportunities that you know in your heart you don’t deserve — then it might be a sign then they like you a little too much, Kerr says.
. Confide in you: Does she do this?
. Big promises: Does she talk of your great future at the company?
. Invite you to : Did she ever invite you to any place outside the work circle?
. Change appearance: Did she try to grab your attention by changing her look at work?
. Value opinion : What’s your opinion to her? Is it more than anyone else’s?
. Compliments: Beyond work issues, did she compliment you more than usual?
. Gifts: Did she give you any gifts, even if it was a small one?
. Remember everything you do or say, did she?
Check on each of these flags, if any of them or few of them existed in your relationship with your boss, then she has some kind of special feeling for you, if not, it is all in your mind.
Guys! We love you all and we’ll be waiting for your comments and active participation in our stories. Until we chat again, read carefully our previous topics, and enjoy our hugs and kisses ❤