Inexorable clashes normally come from accumulative conflicts; the remedy is to avoid them before they come to exist; but let’s first welcome our dear readers and friends everywhere, especially in the US, Ireland, India, Mexico, Hong Kong SAR China, Spain, the UK 😉
Many couples do not speak money until after wedding when it becomes inevitable. So why is it hard to talk about money openly?
lately I read in one of my favorite magazines that you need to start off on the right foot, which is absolutely wise saying. The earlier you talk about money with your partner, the better it would be for you in the future. It would be healthier for your relationship to develop in a good way.
Financial decisions are rarely one-time talk. They are continuous in your life, and with a partner who would be living with you (presumably for the rest of your life) it is clearly the right thing to do is to talk about money, how to spend it, how to budget it, or how to invest it.
A marriage or a relationship is a partnership. You wouldn’t hide cash or accounts from your business partner, and that applies equally to your spouse. It’s not uncommon to maintain separate accounts, of course, but by all means be transparent about them, provided that you have your whole trust in that person. 🙄
If you agree on “No secrets in money”, this will give you a good sign that your partner trusts you; and if not, it means that you still under observation. 😛
You can plan for your monthly expenses, as well as your savings. You can go further to have a goal in common to achieve together. You can invest in stock market or others, depending on the degree of comfort you have.
But just keep in mind that before marriage, if you were not open yet to each other about your financial matters, it means that you should not take this step for the time being. Until you’re 100% sure that you have the right partner to live with for as long as it takes, be patient. When the time is right, you will have the person who will open up for you all her/his financial secrets.
Obviously, it’s important to see eye to eye on financial matters, before getting into the marriage’s knot.
With Denise & Paul, there has been a long talk about this topic, and they both agreed that money matters can cause a lot of problems in marriage, when matters are not clear enough for both sides from the very beginning.